With all the external influences from media, pop culture and/or peer groups, it can be a feat to learn ones authentic identity in adulthood. Yet when a woman becomes a mother, that found identity metamorphosizes into something the same yet completely and profoundly different. All the while, the surrounding world has not changed and is probably not in sync with the subtle and drastic changes of a mother. For this reason, it is so vital and supportive to have mothering groups in which to share in this transformation. Mothering can be revelatory on so many levels. In the same moment it’s amazing and breathtaking as well as terrifying and overwhelming and sometimes disabling. Yet the outside world expects mothers to continue with their previous tasks and smile while adapting to this enormous new responsibility, new identity and new purpose. Some mothers have various levels of support systems and some have none; yet when mothers all convene together they can relate to each other in ways that transcend other external differences.
The pandemic dismantled so many support networks. Fortunately, we are re-connecting those systems. But one silver lining to the last two years is that we have found a way to embrace each other through technology. Yes, it’s different than face to face. But sometimes, mothers do not have the option to find childcare or garner the energy to meet up with people. The internet has made it possible to access support easier.
I am starting a Mother’s Support group running for 10 weeks spanning from April to June. The group will be online and is open to 6 participants. This will be a confidential space in which to share the good, the bad and the ugly with other mothers who know and understand. There will be exercises given and helpful self care practices offered to make this an experience where you can exhale and breathe in comfort and a newfound sense of camaraderie.
Please call me at 707-749-0022 to set up a complimentary individual 20 minute session to assess if the group would be a good fit.
During this time of grave uncertainty, it’s important to know that it is okay to reach out for help. In a shelter in place, it is necessary and required to maintain a level of isolation that under normal circumstances would be concerning. However, we are not living in normal circumstances and therefore, our psyches may be responding in all sorts of new ways. Old coping mechanisms are no longer available to us; support systems are not within reach; stability has been turned upside down. It can be disorienting for the most serene individuals and wreck havoc for those who already have underlying difficulties coping prior to the pandemic.
I just want to assure you that it’s okay to reach out for help even if you have never done so before. We are a social species and it is natural for us as humans to seek solace from another, even when what normally would have been a shoulder to cry on is now a computer screen or telephone line. We are resilient by nature and can adapt to new circumstances. However, sometimes we need each other to offer support or advice or experience on new ways of managing.
Please reach out to your friends, your family, your colleagues, people you admire and respect on the internet, your therapist, your life coach, your partner. We are in this together.
During times of despair, it helps me to balance out with what positive aspects are identifiable. I must say that I enjoy hearing the voices of professionals’ families in the background as they shelter in place and work from home. There is something special about witnessing the personal in a professional. We are all parents, children, siblings, friends, partners. How we relate to people is paramount over our job titles or duties. That is one thing I am grateful for in this devastating experience.
Blessings and safety to you.